Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Do You Hear Voices?

when i wake up there are voices in my head. the bad angel. the good angel. Pretty much every day. the bad angel saying "you're fat, get a job, you're old, you probably have dementia, you're fat..."

The good angel is still asleep because she knows there is nothing to worry about. so it's just the fat angel, i mean bad angel, and me. and my various ailments.

recently i hurt my thumb. it became urgent so i went to Urgent Care. the generic prescription was 90 bucks. welcome to America. and i don't even know how i hurt it! maybe i do have dementia.

at urgent care they weighed me. how rude. i thought they are supposed to make you feel better, not worse. i have inexplicably gained forty pounds since i got married fifteen years ago.

when i got married i thought, with relief, "i don't have to be skinny anymore - i got my man." we could eat, drink, and be merry. and we did, do, and are.

(my brother suggested that maybe my husband rolled over onto my thumb in the night and squished it with his belly. or an even bigger part, like his manhood. i did not tell the doctor that. doctors are not known for their senses of humor.)

7 comments:

Angel-Star said...

does everyone have these voices? or just me?

martinealison said...

Hi Angèle,
Oui j'entends moi aussi des petites voix qui me disent que je suis nulle... et me torturent l'esprit en me faisant croire que tout est mauvais en moi...
Il faut se battre contre elles. Bisous

Sharon McPherson said...

True doctors are not know for their sense of humour ... I dated a doctor once. Once, being the operative word ha!

At least with your voices you get a clear distinction between good angel and naughty angel ... I think my voices are Missy Stubborn (who rules the roost) and Smarty Pants (who is a little bossy herself) - What a hell of a combo! god help me lol

Angel-Star said...

and now i read the side effects of the pills! possibly fatal colitis! that is not attractive in any culture.

Angel-Star said...

actually, sharon, sometimes they switch places, the good and bad angel...very unfair of them, too

Jackee said...

Funny about the squashed thumb!

My husband and I were fattest that first year of marraige. We're trying to wisen up now... it's only taken us eleven years!

Great blog! I was happy to find it!

Angel-Star said...

thanks, Jackee. happy wisening up!